The Long awaited Part two is now here and are you ready for it?
Again, Let me first start off by saying this is not a self-help article!…But still, who am I kidding right? And pretty much just like the 1st article, this is the most self-help article you’ll ever come across, and hopefully you still see it that way.
Without further ado, let’s jump right into it shall well?
- Confident men are successful
So first of all, confidence or rather its effects extend well beyond the dating realm. Success follows confident men everywhere in life. Why? A confident man believes in himself and that’s an attitude that is attractive to most if not all women. Confidence will also bring about promotion, Influence, important associations and success in his career. Important fact: from a biological perspective, women are looking for the “alpha male”. An alpha male is, among many other things very confident.
Science confirms it. “Women prefer men with masculine attributes who show dominant behavior.” And confidence is a sign of masculinity. It demonstrates he is a strong and suitable partner.
- Confident men pursue women
There is something crippling about insecurities, they often hinder you from pursuing someone you like. Confident men aren’t consumed with their own insecurities. As a result, they are able to pursue women without inhibition. This puts women at ease, creating a sense of safety and security in the relationship. Establishing that type of dynamic electric like energy allows women to let down their guard, open up, and receive love.
- Confident men have self-control
Rather than waiting for external validation or others to make them happy, confident men take charge of their own lives. They are solemnly responsible for their own fulfillment. This keeps them from trying to force others to take on that responsibility. Being present is important when building a long-lasting connection. If you’re mindful and self aware, you’re better able to manage your emotions, including the negative. Elizabeth Dorrance Hall, Ph.D. explains mindful people recognize that emotions are fleeting. “Our experiences (and our thoughts about them) come and go,” Hall says.
Women (most if not all) want confident men because they know who they are, what they feel, and how to manage those feelings. Nothing frustrates my female clients more than a man who is a poor communicator and emotionally immature. Life has many challenges, and if you are a man reading this you need to be a team player on this because 10 out of 10 of the women interviewed for this article stated that they need a partner who is a team player. They need someone who will be there when times are tough; someone who is willing to ride it out when there’s a storm. Someone dependable if we are to sum it all up.
- Confident men are strong
Confidence is the ultimate display of masculinity. It communicates strength, capability, courage and reliability. These few key qualities give a sense of safety, which is very important for women. And women feel confident men are stable. This allows them to feel there’s a solid foundation for a lifelong relationship.
Low confidence and low self-esteem go hand-in-hand. When a man has low self-esteem, he is more likely to develop depression and anxiety. For women, emotional safety is necessary for emotional connection. If a man doesn’t have control over his emotions, he can’t provide and protect in the same way. These are two of the most fundamental female needs.
A First Impression
We’ve all probably heard this famous saying, “you don’t get a second chance to make a great first impression.” In business and love, first impressions are everything. – Super true!
How long though does it take to form a first impression of someone? Well research done somewhere by someone says: ten seconds is all it takes. I find this to be very true!
In other words, first impressions are the non verbal communications that take place before a conversation even begins. Basically when we meet someone for the very first time, our brain works fast behind the scenes, assessing the appearance, the facial expressions and the posture. This is all mainly to answer the one most important question: “Am I able to trust this person?”
Did you know your energy introduces you before you even speak? Have you ever seen someone walk in a room who captivated everyone’s attention? That person may not be the most attractive, but one thing is certain: they are confident!
So how do you develop Confidence?
Just like your normal muscle tissue, you can always develop your confidence muscle. ‘Now whether you are a man or woman reading this, confidence is something you can learn and develop. And just like muscles, it takes practice to develop.’ – anonymous
- Focus on your goals and life long targets.
What drives you? Whatever it may be that could get you so pumped up and make you jump out of bed in the morning? Learning what motivates you on a deep level is the first step to becoming more self-aware. Once you are more self-aware, confidence will follow.
It’s rather imperative to understand that you are the one who is in control of your own happiness. You can’t expect another person to do that for you. We all need a passion and a purpose, separate from our romantic relationships. Think of having a partner as the icing on the cake, as the enhancement to the great life. By having this mentality, you will be putting less pressure on yourself and the people you meet.
- Accept self validation.
“First thing I like to do when I wake up is look at myself in the mirror each morning and give myself a ✓ tick of approval.”
Allow yourself to reward yourself. Self rewards and or validation make you know (Subconsciously) that you are deserving of an applause for even the small things you do on a daily, weekly or monthly basis. What it does is it releases a feel good enzyme to your brain that will be stored and remembered that an applause can come even from yourself incase the world outside forgets to do so. You become self-confident.
3. Set small tasks for yourself ( to start with).
For example, if your goal is to meet more people, you can task yourself to meeting at least one new person each week! But of cause bearing in mind the times we currently live in, social gatherings are not encouraged at this time hence it is highly advised to practice caution and observe measures put in place to curb spreading the virus. ( Until this pandemic is under control of cause.) Also Keeping in mind they don’t always have to be romantic interests that you set out to meet. Practicing your social skills will boost your self-confidence.
Challenge yourself, Open yourself to meeting all types of people from different ethnic backgrounds. The more diverse experiences you have, the more well informed you will become. And yes you guessed it, this equals to you getting major doses of confidence.
Making new acquaintances will give you confidence in yourself that you’re the kind of person people like to be around. And over time you’ll be able to do this with women as well. However it is important to note womanizing is not we are pushing for! A true gentleman stays true to one woman!
The more you become socially brilliant, You’ll develop realistic expectations about women and people in general.
Accept and embrace the differences in people
Just as you are different from the person next to you, Accept and embrace that just like how you would want them to accept that you are different from them. Do you get annoyed when someone likes the complete opposite of the things you like? For instance, some people hate the idea of pineapples on pizza, while some think its a genius topping. The takeaway from this is people are different and as such they have different tastes and likes. Learn to be understanding to that fact, be known for that, be that kind of gentleman!